Daily indoctrination with the New York Times

Inspired by an encounter that my friend had with a self-proclaimed hardcore conservative–at the gym of all places!–who made the age-old assertion that the New York Times, CNN, and the gang are knee-jerk liberal publications that have indoctrinated my friend–I have decided to probe my own susceptibility to the dogmatic agenda of the Times.

If the Times is the thorough paper it claims to be–the paper of record–its editors probably insert their doctrinaire socialism in everything from front page news about Iraq to features on real estate in the Hamptons, so I can look to the few articles I read a day from the Times website–I’m not enough of a liberal yet to rely upon it as my prime news source!–and parse the impact of their subtle or not so subtle liberalism upon me and my daily life.

First up is an article I read yesterday about the difficulty of reconciling our circadian rhythms with the daily work schedule. I would have never picked up on it were I not being mindful for this experiment, but in fact, there are several pieces of the liberal agenda that are advanced in this article, innocuously titled “That Yawn After Lunch is Perfectly Normal.”

Right off the bat, it propogates that lifestyle element almost as familiar to liberals as “homosexuality”: sloth. That’s right, author Phyllis Korkki insists that being “overcome by drowsiness” after lunch is symptomatic of a suspiciously fraudulent-sounding symptom called the “post-lunch dip” which “represents a collision of biology and economics.” Though this assertion is hardly revolutionary on the surface, it is characteristic of the liberal belief that market efficiency is something distasteful and that it is best avoided by instating and even rewarding a culture of laziness by attributing it to a legitimate-sounding biological reaction.

In fact, this article relies heavily on biology, a field which we all know to be founded and made up by heathen liberals who insist that humans are a product not of an all-powerful deity but of environmental adaptation:

It is entirely natural for humans to want to go to sleep about seven hours after they have awakened

[...] First, the 24-hour cycle of the body, or its circadian rhythm, is naturally in a resting phase at this time. In the afternoon, it happens to converge with another physiological cycle — known as homeostatic — that measures the amount of time spent awake and that is also pushing for a rest.

Add the effects of food, which can also induce drowsiness, and an overpowering desire to sleep may result.

This screed goes on to advances the mantra of liberal decision-making as a solution: if it feels right, do it. Rather than try to stave off the weak cravings of the body, it is suggested to give in:

Often, these people are ashamed of their behavior because it is associated with laziness, Dr. [David F.] Dinges said. But by giving in to the urge, they are actually improving the quality of their work.

Finally, the article urges the sort of insubordinance that leads to class warfare, going so far as to praise the practices of socialist Europeans:

In countries like Spain, where siestas are part of culture and late dinners are the norm, that kind of arrangement may be practical. But allowing an hour for lunch and several hours for nap time is not feasible for most companies.

More realistically, a 20-minute “power nap” can often have a rejuvenating effect, Dr. Zee said.

Conclusion: 1 out of 1 article biased